Monthly Archives: August 2018

Shedding the Hero Complex

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My Favorite Superhero

If you had to pick a favorite superhero, who would it be? I love all the Marvel and D.C. Comics movies. I love watching the good guys crush the bad guys. If I had to pick a favorite, I think I would pick Captain America. He always shows up to save the day. He always does the right thing. No matter the odds, no matter how hopeless the situation, Captain America always rights the wrongs.

The Real Hero

We often forget who the hero in our life is. We have been duped over the years by thinking we are the hero in this story called life. We run around trying to fix people. We spend our time running from one hurt and broken person to the next, pouring out ourselves. We love others, encourage them, try to help them, while thinking that we are the hero in their story. But we have the story turned around. The hero is not us, and it’s not the church. The Hero is Jesus Christ.

We are to introduce people to Jesus.  Jesus is the only One who can save us, forgive us, redeem us, and bring us hope and peace. Jesus is the Hero in each and every story.

Getting Tired of Being the Hero

We find ourselves getting discouraged and weary of helping and loving people. We want to stop the pain and the hurt that comes from loving people, from ministering to people because they only hurt us in return. We give and give, only to find no one to give back to us. We give until we are spent and have nothing left to give, yet no one seems to notice or care. It’s no wonder that so many pastors walk away from ministry, faithful church members leave the church, and people get hurt, offended, and fed up with the church.

Paul’s Confession

Paul understood this concept of being spent for people. He understood loving people and being there for them during their time of need. He also understood that the more he gave himself away to people, the more he gave his love away, the less it was returned.

And I will very gladly spend and be spent for you; though the more abundantly I love you, the less I be loved. II Corinthians 12:15

The Solution

The only way to keep giving and loving others is to remember that we can never be everything that people need us to be. We have to shed the hero complex and realize that we can not fix other people, no matter how much we want to. We have to remember that only God can. Love them, empathize with them, walk through tragedies with them, but always remember to continually point them back to the true hero, Jesus.

 

super hero boy

photo credit:
Porapak Apichodilok

 

Knowing When to Wait and When to Move Forward

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Wait or Move Forward?

One of the things I have struggled with over the years is knowing when I am supposed to wait on God and when I am supposed to move forward with something and take the next step. I think that’s because it’s constantly changing. There have been times when God has clearly led me to wait on Him and be patient. There have been other times that God has shown me that He wants me to take the next step.

No matter how many times He has had me do both, it’s still something that I really struggle with. If I am not careful, I lean too hard one way or another.

Waiting on God

There are several verses in the Bible about standing still and waiting on God. Here are a few.

And Moses said unto the people, Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord, which he will shew to you today: Exodus 14:13

Ye shall not need to fight in this battle: set yourselves, stand ye still, and see the salvation of the Lord with you, O Judah and Jerusalem: fear not, nor be dismayed; tomorrow go out against them: for the Lord will be with you. II Chronicles 20:17

Hearken unto this, O Job: stand still, and consider the wondrous works of God. Job 37:14

Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord. Psalm 27:14

Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for him: Psalm 37:7

My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him. Psalm 62:5

Most of the time, I feel that God is urging me to wait, be still, stand still, and wait for him to work. But then sometimes God shakes things up.

Everybody Always

I have been reading Everybody Always by Bob Goff. It is such a great book! I highly recommend it. While I was reading it a few days ago, some of the phrases leaped off the page at me.

What a shame it would be if we were waiting for God to say something while He’s been waiting on us to do something. 

So many times we are waiting on God to take the next step. We keep praying and praying, but we don’t get any answer. His voice is silent.

He’s so confident we already know what to do next that He’s willing to be silent even when we ask for His voice.

Sometimes God is confidently quiet. He is confident we have all the information we need. We may not have had experience with the circumstances we’re presently facing, but He’s allowed us to experience a lifetime of other things to prepare us for what is coming next…The moment we take even a tiny shuffle forward, what God is already thinking about is is this: I love you. You’ve got this. You know enough.

Stop Waiting and Take the Next Step

His words really got me thinking. Think about this, the Red Sea didn’t part until Moses stretched his arm out over the water, Naaman wasn’t healed until he dipped seven times in the Jordan River, Goliath wasn’t killed until David picked out five stones and put one into a sling, blind Bartimaeus wasn’t given sight until he cried out to Jesus, the woman with an issue of blood wasn’t healed until she reached out and touched Jesus’ clothes, thousands of people would not have gotten saved if Peter hadn’t chosen to preach at Pentecost.

There are times when God wants us to wait, but there are other times when God wants us to stop waiting and take a step into what He has for us next.

How do we know which one we are supposed to do? Over the years, Matt and I have established some principles to help us make the right decision.

When to Stand Still and Wait

  1. Stand still if you don’t know the next logical step.
  2. Wait when you have no peace about moving forward.
  3. Don’t make any important decisions when you are tired, lonely, discouraged, or depressed. If you feel overcome with any of these feelings, it is not time to take a step.
  4. Stand still if you feel the urge to run, quit, or stop doing what you know you are supposed to be doing right now.

When to Take the Next Step

  1. Move forward if God has shown you the next step. It may be just a tiny step in the right direction. The entire plan may not be visible, and you may not understand it, but you feel God leading you to take the next step.
  2. Go forward when God lines up your circumstances to push you to take the next step. You may not be ready, but circumstances dictate a change.
  3. Take the next step when deep inside your heart, you know God wants you to go in this direction. You may not be able to explain, but you know in your heart that God wants you to do this. He confirms it through reading His Word, through the preaching at church, and through wise counselors.

When God Leads You to Move

When you get stuck in life and can’t decide what to do next, whether to wait or go forward, go back to the last time God led you clearly to do something. Did you follow Him? Did you obey Him? Maybe that is where God is waiting for you.

God has a way of keeping our vision clouded until He suddenly lines everything up and we know what it is we are supposed to do next. Matt has a saying he often tells people… “When God decides to work, He will open a door so wide you can drive a Mac truck through it.” Wait until He makes it clear, then step through that open door and get ready to watch God do the impossible.

cover of book