Category Archives: Personal Growth

3 Lies I Buy Into that Show What I Believe About God

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girl looking at sunset — photo credit: Anatol Lem

Lies that We Believe about Ourselves

I’m reading Get Out of Your Head by Jennie Allen right now in my morning time and loving it. In her book, Jennie writes that her friend, a licensed therapist, told her that every lie we tell ourselves is rooted in one of these three lies.

I’m helpless.

I’m worthless.

I’m unlovable.

Jennie goes on to say, “Every lie we buy into about ourselves is rooted in what we believe about God.” That caught my attention. I went back and read it again. Those three lies are at the heart of every lie I believe about myself, and every time I give into believing one of those lies, I’m showing what I truly think and believe about God.

Let’s look at these lies in more detail.

Lie #1: I’m helpless.

This may not feel like something we tell ourselves very often. But before we check this off our list and move on, let’s expand on the thought. These may hit a little closer to home.

I can’t change.

I am dependent on _________________.

I’m tapped out.

I’m unable to…

I can’t do this anymore.

I am weak.

I’m ready to give up.

Do those hit a little closer to home? I know they do for me. In fact, those have been some of the thoughts I’ve had the last few weeks. January and February are notoriously months that I struggle with feeling depressed and discouraged. A lot of people do; it’s called seasonal affective disorder. In short, it’s winter depression. I find myself ready to give up every January and February. I feel like everything I am doing is a waste of time. Nobody cares. I usually want to just crawl back into bed, throw the covers over my head and binge read. Some people binge on Netflix; I binge on books.

So how do we refute the thought and lie that I’m helpless, ready to give up, tapped out, weak, unable to change?

We have to choose to believe what God says.

I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.
Philippians 4:13 KJV

We are pressed on every side by troubles, but not crushed and broken. We are perplexed because we don’t know why things happen as they do, but we don’t give up and quit.We are hunted down, but God never abandons us. We get knocked down, but we get up again and keep going.
II Corinthians 4:8,9 TLB

We use our powerful God-tools for smashing warped philosophies, tearing down barriers erected against the truth of God, fitting every loose thought and emotion and impulse into the structure of life shaped by Christ.
II Corinthians 10:5 MSG

We have to come back to God. It’s God who will give me the strength to be who and what I need to be. We may fall, but God helps us to stand back up and keep going. Matt and I say this to each other, “We may be knocked down, but we’re not out.” We have to tear down the thoughts that say I’m helpless and not give them power.

Lie #2: I’m Worthless

Why do women struggle so much with feeling worthless? We work hard at our jobs, care for our families, run our homes, constantly help others, yet we feel like none of this is enough. We feel we have no worth in who we are.

Yet, God has the exact opposite to say about us.

For you know that you were not redeemed from your vain way of life inherited from your fathers with perishable things, like silver or gold, but with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot.
I Peter 1:18,19 MEV

Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Therefore do not fear. You are more valuable than many sparrows.
Luke 12:6, 7 MEV

You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit them together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! It is amazing to think about. Your workmanship is marvelous—and how well I know it.
Psalm 139:13, 14 TLB

Do those verses sound like we have no value? Just the opposite, actually. God saw enough value in you that He gave his Son to redeem you. He created every part of you and knows you better than you know yourself. He knows how many hairs are on your head. That sounds like you are incredibly valuable to Him.

Lie # 3: I’m unlovable

If you didn’t relate to the first two lies, you can probably related to this one. Most women, including myself, struggle with feeling lovable. We are so incredibly hard on ourselves. Then because we’re hard on ourselves, we in turn are hard on those closest to us which makes us feel badly about ourselves… and that circles back to making us feel unlovable. It’s a vicious circle.

This is something I constantly struggle with. I am so hard on myself, never feeling like I’m doing enough, trying hard enough. Then I turn that attitude on my kids and push them to do more, work harder, do better. Then when I lie in bed in the dark of night, I feel guilty because I was too hard on my kids once again. That in turn makes me feel unlovable…and the cycle continues.

What does God have to say about it?

None of this fazes us because Jesus loves us. I’m absolutely convinced that nothing—nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable—absolutely nothing can get between us and God’s love because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us.
Romans 8:38,39 MSG

And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully.
Ephesians 3:18,19 NLT

What marvelous love the Father has extended to us! Just look at it—we’re called children of God! That’s who we really are.
I John 3:1 MSG

You may have to take a moment to go back and read those verses to truly let them sink in. This lie, I am unloveable, is rooted in what I believe about God. If I believe this lie, I believe that God doesn’t really love me. And that, my friend is the furthest thing from the truth. That is a straight-up lie from the enemy. He wants you to feel that way, but that is so not true. The truth is that God loves you absolutely and completely and far more than your human mind could comprehend.

There is nothing in this world that can separate you from his love. It’s too vast for us to even begin to understand. We are his children. If you have kids, take a moment to think about how much you love them. You would do anything to protect your children, to make sure they know they’re loved, that they’re valuable, that they matter. Why would it be any different with God? Only, his love is so much greater than our human love.

The Truth

We, as Christian women as a whole, have believed these lies for far too long. It’s time to start believing the truth. Here’s the truth.

You are strong because you are a child of God.

You have incredible value and worth.

God loves you so much.

Write those truths down someplace where you can see them every day because it’s not enough to hear them one time. We need to hear these truths every day. Then, when we’ve begun to internalize these truths, we need to speak them into the lives of the women around us—our sisters, our daughters, our friends, our co-workers. Then, just for the fun of it, speak them to the men in your life too. They need to hear them as well.

How much could our lives change for the better if we stopped believing these lies about ourselves and started believing the truth instead? If we truly started believing that we are powerful through Christ, that we have incredible worth, and that we are so loved by God, we could begin to change our corner of the world. After all, we don’t have to change the entire world, just our corner of it.

Erasing God from My Story

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Our Harrowing Experience Last Night

Have you ever had an experience where you just knew God had his hand on you and protected you? That happened to our family last night.

Last night, we were driving home from our date night. Matt’s parents watch the kids on Thursday nights, so Matt and I can go on a date. We picked the kids up and began driving home. Matt was driving, going about 70 mph on the highway. I was looking at my phone, telling Matt about a text I had just received when he suddenly jerked the car hard to the left, swerving into the other lane. My head jerked, and I caught the flash of a car that had already passed us.

It happened so fast, I barely saw the car. I watched as it flew down the highway and weaved in and out of traffic. We drive on this particular highway quite often, and there are always people driving too fast. But this one takes the cake. I have no idea how fast the car was going, but it was fast!

My heart racing, I glanced over at Matt. “Good reflexes. You okay?”

“Yeah, I saw him in the rear view mirror,” Matt said.

The kids were all quiet for a moment; then Maggie asked, “What happened?”

“Somebody was driving way too fast,” I said.

It took several moments for my heart rate to slow down. That had been too close. I have no idea what that driver was thinking. We were just driving in our lane. If Matt hadn’t moved when he did… it wouldn’t have been good. I spent a moment in quiet, thanking God for His protection of our family.

Seeing God’s Hand of Protection

There are times like that when you can easily look back and know with all certainty that God was protecting you and working in your life. I wonder how many times, though, God is working in and through our lives, and we have no idea. We just don’t see it because it’s not as obvious.

We’ve been so conditioned to just write God out of the story of our lives. We don’t even realize that we are erasing God from our lives.

Studying the Book of Jonah

I’m reading the book of Jonah right now in my morning time, and we’re also doing Jonah in our small group study on Tuesday nights. On Tuesday, we were talking about all the times God showed up directly in Jonah’s life. Matt asked the question, “What would happen if we just erased God from Jonah’s story?”

It really made me think. Honestly, it wouldn’t be that hard to do. Let’s look at the story of Jonah and God’s involvement in his life.

Seeing God’s Hand in Jonah’s Life

There are nine times we see God work directly in Jonah’s life. The book of Jonah is only four chapters long. It’s short, yet we see God acting over and over again in this small book.

Look at the nine times God directly does something.

God tells Jonah to go to Nineveh 1:2
God sent a storm 1:4
God prepares a fish to swallow Jonah 1:17
God tells the fish to spit Jonah out 2:10
God tells Jonah a second time to go to Nineveh 3:2
God grows a small tree to give Jonah shade 4:6
God creates a worm that destroys the tree 4:7
God causes a hot wind 4:8
God rebukes Jonah 4:9

Erasing God from Jonah’s Story

What would it look like if we totally erased God from the story of Jonah? We would have a very different story to tell. Yet, we could easily do it. Jonah could just have as easily done that. Here’s how Jonah could have seen it.

Jonah gets a feeling he should go to Nineveh.
A storm comes up while he’s out at sea
He gets thrown in the water, but a fish happened to be swimming nearby and swallows him
A few days later, the fish spits him out
He decides maybe he should go to Nineveh after all
He finds a small tree to give him shade
A worm comes and destroys his tree
A hot wind develops
He feels badly about how he acted

Erasing God in Our Own Lives

Do you see how easy it was to replace God in Jonah’s story? It’s pretty easy to take each of the times God directly acted in Jonah’s life and replace it with just life or circumstances.

It makes me wonder, how many times have I removed God from my story? How many times have I “rewritten” my story, erasing God from the picture. Things happen, and I just chalk it up to “life happening.”

Looking For God’s Hand

Jonah’s story encourages me because it makes me believe that God is more actively involved in my life than I give Him credit for. I believe if we really understood God, we would see His hand a whole lot more in our lives.

Let’s choose to actively seek God in the mundane of our ordinary day. I believe if we start searching for His involvement, we will end up seeing it so much more.

Then when you do see Him at work in your life, write it down so you don’t forget. I think we will begin to understand that God is alive and at work more in our lives than we ever realized.

For More Encouragement

For more encouragement on this topic, read When You Can’t See God Working in Your Life. If life looks different than you thought it would, and you’re having a hard time seeing God working in your own life, two books to encourage you would be It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way: Finding Unexpected Strength When Disappointments Leave You Shattered by Lysa TerKeurst or my book, The Hidden Pain: When You Fear God is No Longer Blessing Your Life.

A Virtual Hug from Me to You

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(This post contains an affiliate link. Read my full disclosure HERE.)

A Virtual Hug

I can’t believe we’re already halfway through January. While some people are off to an amazing start and crushing it with accomplishing their goals, others are struggling big time. I’ve had conversations with three different women over the course of the last week all of whom are struggling. They feel like life is crushing them. Each of them is in different circumstances, and each of their stories is different. Yet, I found myself saying the same thing to each of them—There is nothing wrong with you.

I don’t know if you’re struggling right now. I have no idea what you’re going through, but I know we can all find encouragement in being reminded that we are valued. If I could, I would give you a hug. But since I’m not near you and the whole hugging thing is kind of nixed right now because of Covid, I want to give you a virtual hug.

So consider this a hug from me as I remind you of a few simple truths today.

1. Your value is not in what you can do, it’s in who you are.

Too many of us focus on what we do. We feel we are only valuable when we put something out into the world or accomplish something great. Yet, that’s not true at all. If you never accomplished anything else for the rest of your life, you would still be of value simply because you are you.

Are not two sparrows sold for a farthing? and one of them shall not fall on the ground without your Father. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear ye not therefore, ye are of more value than many sparrows.
Matthew 10:29-31

2. You can not do anything to make God love you any more; neither can you do anything to make Him love you any less.

Sometimes we forget that Jesus’ love for us has no boundaries or conditions. We get so hard on ourselves. I feel like that’s our specialty as women—being hard on ourselves. We need to let go of the expectations we have for ourselves and simply rest in the knowledge that God loves us just as we are, and that’s enough.

Observe how Christ loved us. His love was not cautious but extravagant. He didn’t love in order to get something from us but to give everything of himself to us. Love like that.
Ephesians 5:2 MSG

3. There is nothing wrong with you.

You were lovingly crafted by a perfect Creator. To criticize yourself is to criticize the Creator. He made you exactly as He wanted you to be. So take comfort and joy in that. Be who God made you to be without apologizing for it.

That means we will not compare ourselves with each other as if one of us were better and another worse. We have far more interesting things to do with our lives. Each of us is an original.
Galatians 5:26 MSG

Wherever you are today, I wish I could reach out and hug you and share these truths personally. Instead, let this be your virtual hug as I remind you that you are valuable, God loves you just as you are, and there is nothing wrong with you.

For more encouragement, read Encouragement for the Weary Soul.

A great book to make you laugh is Have More Fun: How to be Remarkable, Stop Feeling Stuck, and Start Enjoying Life by Mandy Arioto.

Finding Free- Coming Soon!

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Finding Free

I am so excited about my new book coming out in just a few weeks—Finding Free: 5 Simple Steps to a More Peaceful, Content, and Happy You. To give you an idea of what the book is about, continue reading below. This is the introduction to my book.

Introduction

If you had told me years ago that I would write a book on finding free, I would have laughed. I was the least free person I knew! My life felt out of control; I lived a frustrated life, one in which I was just existing. I didn’t wake up each day excited about the possibilities life had to offer. I didn’t know who I was or what God wanted me to do with my life. I was merely being carried along by other people’s desires and plans for my life.

The process of getting to where I am today was not by my own planning or choosing. Actually, it was quite the opposite. God turned my life completely upside down and changed everything for me. I didn’t realize it at the time because so many changes were coming at me hard and fast. But I realize now, looking back, that God was turning my life right side up. He was changing everything around me and subsequently changing me as well.

I talk to so many women who are lost, confused, frustrated, lonely, fearful, and feel like they have lost sight of who they are. That was me. If you feel like there must be a better way to live, that God has something more for you, then this book is for you.

What Finding Free Isn’t

Before I explain what finding free is, I want to start by telling you what it isn’t. Finding free is not a problem-free life. If you picked this book up with that in mind, you’re going to be sorely disappointed. Jesus himself told us that this life is not going to be easy. He tells us in John 18:33 that in this world, we will experience tribulation. We could just stop there. Life is hard—end of story. Thankfully, Jesus doesn’t stop there with those hopeless words! He continues with five hope-filled words: “I have overcome the world.” He didn’t leave us to try to figure things out on our own. He promised he would never leave us nor forsake us in this world full of hardships (Hebrews 13:5).

Our life is not going to be problem-free just because we find free. My life is probably more problem-filled than it’s ever been, but here’s the key: I have incredible peace and am so content with where God has me despite the messy life around me.

So many women I talk to are not happy, not content. They are stuck in jobs they can’t stand or are at home living lives that are empty and unfulfilling. We want more, want to experience more; we crave finding what will truly make us happy and content. Yet, we are utterly clueless about how to find it or even know what it is we’re searching for.

Finding More

I felt so trapped in the life I was living for so long. I spent so many years spinning in circles, trying to find what I was missing and what I was supposed to do with my life, trying to figure out why things weren’t working out and why I wasn’t fulfilled. I knew God had more for my life, but I didn’t know how to find it.

God created us to experience an abundant life, not a mediocre, okay life. He said in John 10:10, “I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” That doesn’t sound like a boring life. It doesn’t sound stressful or empty. It sounds like what finding free looks like.

What Finding Free Is

Finding free is about discovering who God created you to be and being completely okay with that. It’s about finding what God has created you to do and chasing after it with your whole heart. It’s about learning to turn a deaf ear to critics and people who don’t want you to succeed. It’s about learning to abandon people-pleasing, about realizing that you will never please everybody.

It’s about learning to step into the life God wants you to live. It’s about leaving behind busy and pursuing peace. It’s about pushing perfectionism out of your life and accepting the messiness of your life. It’s doing more of what fills you up and less of what drains you. It’s about creating a life you love. It’s about letting go of the secret rules you have that are holding you back. It’s about finding momentum and moving forward. It’s about letting go of shame and comparison. It’s about finding total freedom. It’s about finding the love you’ve always wanted but don’t know how to have. Finding free is about all of this and more.

I have broken down finding free into five simple steps. We’ll spend several chapters on each step so we can really delve into them:

Understand Your Personality
Discover Your Purpose
Create a Life You Love
Allow God to Redirect You
Release the Shame

Finding Free is a Journey

I’m going to warn you: finding free is a journey. You aren’t going to find it in a day, and you won’t find it a week from now. It’s going to take time. It took me years to get to where I am today. But don’t let that discourage you. There’s a secret that every traveler knows, and it’s this: there’s joy found in the journey, not just the destination.

Throughout this book, I’ll share parts of my story of finding free to help you get your journey of finding free started. After that, it will be up to you to continue your own journey. The key is not quitting until you have found your freedom. As Tony Robbins says, “The only impossible journey is the one you never take.”1

Don’t get discouraged and quit halfway through this book or halfway through your own journey. You won’t ever find free.

It may feel at times that you’re better off just staying where you are in life. There may come a time when it feels like it’s too hard to create your own version of free. Don’t believe the lie! It will be work, and it will be difficult. There will be decisions you have to make, people you have to leave behind, and things you must release from your life. However, if you stick with it, I promise you will come out on the other side living your own version of free, and you’ll be so grateful you didn’t throw in the towel.

Why I Wrote this Book

The life I am living now can simply be summed up as finding free. I spent my entire life trying to live a certain way, be a certain kind of person, and letting others dictate my life for me. Now I am content in who I am and what God has me doing.

It’s taken a lot of years, a lot of purposeful decisions. Our family has made a lot of changes over the years. We’ve made sacrifices to live the life we are living now. But I can say without a doubt that we are peaceful, content, and happy with the life we have created.

I decided to write this book for this very reason. So many people I talk to are not free. They aren’t living a life they love. More than that, they are miserable. They don’t know who they are or what they’re supposed to do in life. They feel empty, like they are missing something. They feel like they are a mistake or not good enough.

This book is for them. If you feel any of those things, this book is for you. I want you to find your own version of free. I don’t want you to struggle like I did for so many years. I want you to learn from my mistakes so you don’t have to make them yourself.

Using This Book

If you want to find freedom, then use this book as a manual. Keep a pen and a highlighter handy. Underline things, cross out what doesn’t work for you, highlight what helps you. Mark this book up. Digest it; let it change you. The best books I’ve read are marked up because I don’t want to forget what I learned from somebody else. I want to learn from their failures so I don’t have to experience them myself. I want to learn from their successes so I can experience those successes myself.

When you’ve finished this book, pass it on to somebody else. We all need to find free in our lives. Are you ready to get started? Are you ready to begin your journey of finding free? Grab a pen and get ready. Finding free begins now.

*Be sure to follow Faithfully Stepping on both Facebook and Instagram for a release date. While you’re waiting for Finding Free to release, check out my other book, The Hidden Pain: When You Fear God is No Longer Blessing Your Life. You can read about that book in The Hidden Pain: A Peek into the Book I’m Writing.

Discouraged? 12 Ideas to Try

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A Bad Start to A New Year

It’s been a week! We started out the new year ready to let go of 2020 and all the negativity that came with it. Yet, here we are, just days into the new year and it’s a mess again. As a result, you are probably feeling as hopeless and discouraged as I am.

Our Reminder

However, I listened to a message by Rick Warren that reminded that Jesus’ kingdom is not of this world. Jesus told us repeatedly that He was not of this world and that his kingdom was not of this world. When it was time to go to the cross, Jesus rebuked Peter when he tried to fight off the guards who were preparing to take Jesus away. He looked at Peter and said, “If I wanted to fight, I could call legions of angels at this very moment.” But that was not God’s plan.

God’s plan has never been to make this earth perfect. He told us in John 16:32, that in this world we will have tribulation. That’s because this world is full of sinful people. We live in a broken, sinful world. We can focus on that and be discouraged, or we can focus on the fact that this isn’t our home.

Jesus reminds us in the book of John that He was not of this world, just as we are not of this world.

I have given them thy word; and the world hath hated them, because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world.
John 17:14 KJV

They are no more defined by the world
Than I am defined by the world.
John 17:14 MSG

This World Doesn’t Define Me

When we get discouraged and disillusioned by all that’s going on around us, we need to remind ourselves with this truth— this world doesn’t define us. This world of sin, brokenness, and hatred does not define us.

We need to take our eyes off of our circumstances and everything going on around us and look up. Remember where our kingdom is. We are part of a heavenly kingdom, a place where there is no sin.

So, what do we do in the meantime until we get to that heavenly kingdom? Because right now we’re stuck in a world of hatred and hurt. Here are twelve ideas to try when you are discouraged to get your mind off of things around you.

Twelve Ways to Be Filled Up

Find encouragement and strength by starting your mornings with God. Start a morning time routine.
Read inspirational and encouraging books that help you focus on the good in life and not all that’s taking place around us. Check out Manney Resources for books to encourage your heart.
Listen to uplifting, God-centered music. Try these 3 Songs to Encourage Your Heart.
Spend time with friends or family. Sometimes just being around people that love you and that aren’t going to drag you down can really help at times like these.
Don’t look at social media or watch the news. Take a break from all the negativity.
Plan a fun night with your family— a movie night, a game night… something to get your mind off all the negativity around you.
Take a nap. Getting extra rest can be really helpful to take away the feeling of helplessness or depressing thoughts.
Buy one thing that brings you joy. Buy some fresh flowers for your table, a candle that you love, a puzzle to work on, some new nail polish, a new pair of earrings, a new book… something that brings you joy.
Bake some cookies to take to your neighbors or take a meal to someone who is having a hard time.
Drive somewhere new and explore the area. Find a new restaurant or coffee shop to try.
Get a craft kit and create something or try your hand at something new like sewing, knitting, painting, etc.
Pick one drawer, closet, or space in your home that you want to organize and feel good about it when it’s done.

Remember…

These are just some simple ideas to help get our focus off of everything around us. The most important thing to remember is that we are not defined by this world, just as Jesus wasn’t defined by this world. Let that thought encourage you today.

A New Year! 3 Steps to Take to Have Your Best Year Yet!

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365 New Mornings

It’s a beautiful new year. There’s something about the beauty of a new year. It’s empty and full of so many possibilities. Because my passion is mornings, I see 365 mornings stretched out before me. I see 365 new mornings and new mercies.

It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:22,23 KJV

God’s compassion starts fresh every morning. He gives us a fresh supply of mercy and compassion each morning. That’s the most encouraging thought as we face a brand new year.

Facing this New Year with Confidence

While everybody around us may face this new year with fear, trepidation, and uncertainty, we can step into this year with confidence in a God who has not forsaken us, in a God who gives us a clean slate every day.

Just as we can be sure that the sun will rise every day this year, we can be equally sure that God will walk alongside us every day in this new year.

If you want this year to be better than any other year so far, I believe it begins with three simple steps. If you want to have the best year yet, start with these three steps.

1. Write Down Your Goals and Dreams for this Year

You May Say I'm a Dreamer Journal — My Dream Journal

If you want to accomplish something great, it starts with writing it down. Take the time in these first few days of the new year to write down all the dreams you have for this year and what you want to accomplish.

open journal with the words 2021 goals and dreams written — Inside my Dream Journal before I wrote down my goals for the year

If you don’t write it down, you probably won’t accomplish it. Every year, I take the time to write down what I want to accomplish. Those goals range from books I want to write, projects I want to complete, vacations I want to take, places I want to visit, things I want to do, goals personally, and more.

“Setting goals is the first step in turning the invisible into the visible.”
Tony Robbins

“People with clear, written goals, accomplish far more in a shorter period of time than people without them could ever imagine.”
Brian Tracy

2. Get Up Early

If you want to accomplish great things for God this year, it starts with getting up earlier. When Matt and got really serious about our mornings and got up earlier than we ever had before and started doing it on a consistent basis, our creativity and productivity grew in leaps and bounds.

If you want to find extra time in your day to begin to accomplish your dreams, I believe it can be found in getting up earlier and starting your day with God, then moving on to what He has for you for the day. There’s so many wasted hours waiting to be claimed in the early morning hours.

“The difference between rising at five and seven o’clock in the morning, for 40 years, supposed a man to go to bed at the same hour at night, is nearly equivalent to the addition of ten years to a man’s life.”
Philip Doddridge

3. Develop a Morning Time Routine

After you set goals and determine to get up earlier, the third step is to develop a consistent morning time routine. This is the routine you do every morning that sets you up for success for the rest of your day. My morning time routine starts with making a cup of coffee and lighting a candle. Then I begin my time with God. Reading my Bible, journaling, and doing my prayer time. For more details about my morning time routine, read Creating a Morning Time Routine You Love.

Matt and I have created a system we call 30 to THRIVE. It consists of reading your Bible or doing a devotional for 10 minutes, journaling for ten minutes, and reading a book for ten minutes. You can find out more at Manney Resources where you can download a free Morning Time Guide to help you get started on your journey,

Matt and I believe that if you can change your morning, you can grow your faith and change your life, and you do that best by developing a morning time routine.

2021

2021 can be your best year yet! Start with writing down your goals for the year, then figure out how to get up earlier consistently. Lastly, implement a morning time routine and see if that doesn’t make this year your best one yet!

The Backwardness of the Manger and Bethlehem

Why Bethlehem?

The little town of Bethlehem must have been buzzing the day Joseph and Mary finally arrived. Out of town guests were looking for lodging. Roman officials were dealing with the local Jewish tax collectors. The tax collectors were scheming and plotting. Pickpockets were eyeing up unsuspecting targets. Airbnb was trying to keep up with the onslaught of business. What was it about Bethlehem that made it the locale for the census to be taken?

Bethlehem was Joseph’s hometown of ancestry as a descendant of Kind David, the most famous biblical character known for coming from Bethlehem. It was a perfect rest stop for travelers going north or south.

The census ordered by Caesar was not a pleasant event. Some historians believe Caesar called for multiple censuses throughout the years to be sure the Jews were being counted and most importantly, taxed. It’s amazing how God orchestrated a political event with a prophetic event to bring about His will.

Why the Manger?

Why does the word manger come up so many times in the Nativity story? Luke mentions it several times. He tells us Mary wrapped baby Jesus in swaddling clothes and laid him in a manger because there was no room in the inn. (Luke 2:7) The angels tell the shepherds they would know Jesus was the baby they were looking for because they would find him wrapped in swaddling clothes, evidently something you didn’t normally wrap a baby in, and laying in a manger—again something that was not necessarily a custom of their day. The shepherds leave the fields and go looking for Jesus. They find him just as the angel said, lying in a manger. Luke records for us in Luke 1:32 that Jesus was destined to sit on the throne of his father David. Yet we find him lying in a feed trough for animals.

The feed trough or manger we picture today in our Nativity scenes looks nothing like what Mary used to lay Jesus in. The wooden cross-piece of furniture set center stage in a creche is a far cry from the stone piece used in the first-century. Mangers were often crafted with a combination of clay mixed with straw and formed into a trough to place feed or hay in for the animals to eat from. Other times they were chiseled into natural rock outcroppings.

Why didn’t Mary just hold Jesus? Where was Joseph? Mary and Joseph were simply human. They were exhausted and needed to sleep; just as baby Jesus needed to sleep. They needed a safe place for Jesus to lay while they slept. The manger was what was available, so that’s what they chose to use.

For Such a Time as This

Sometimes we try to sanitize Bible stories. Think about the turmoil of Bethlehem politically, socially, religiously, and economically. The Jews already hated the Romans because of their overbearing taxation. The presence of the Romans was undeniable. The people couldn’t get away from the heel of the Romans pushing down upon their necks. Yet, God chose such a time as this for Jesus to be born.

Imagine the cries of a baby Jesus filling the stable. Imagine the tired eyes of a weary, post-labor and delivery Mary. Think of the worry of a humble and hardworking Joseph looking to protect and provide for his newborn and young wife.

These are the moments to watch God work. God doesn’t come with a grand ad campaign, billboards, and thirty-second commercials on television. God didn’t crowdsource His cause with masses wearing wristbands and t-shirts with a two-toned silhouette of a baby with the words “FOR the MANGER” screen-printed across the front.

God’s Subtle Work

Jesus slipped in unannounced. He settled into a shelter used for beasts of burden. He came in the form of an unassuming six-pound baby. And when God felt the need to let people know about it, He tapped the least credentialed social group in town to come to the party—the shepherds. Everything was backward about Bethlehem and the manger, but that is exactly what arrests our attention.

God’s way and plan is always the best plan. He works even through our difficult circumstances to get us where we need to be at just the right place and just the right time.

Recapture Christmas

This post was taken from Recapture Christmas: Unwrap the Mystery and Wonder of the Manger, a 30-Day Devotional Study. Each day contains a reading similar to the one above and Scripture reading and questions to answer for application. If you liked this post, then you will love the devotional.

If you still need Christmas presents, check out this devotional or A Few of My Favorite Things.

A Few of My Favorite Things…Gift Ideas for Christmas

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(This post contains affiliate links. You can read my full disclosure HERE.)

Sometimes coming up with Christmas ideas that are new and different is so difficult. I love when somebody else makes a list of their favorite things because it gives me new ideas for things to try. So I made a list of some of our family’s favorite things. Hopefully, it will give you some ideas.

Some of Our Favorite Games

Five Crowns Matt and I love to play this game on date nights or days off. It’s a fun card game that you don’t have to think a whole lot about and can just sit and talk as you play. The kids enjoy playing it as well.
Werewolf This is a great party game. The more people, the better it is. It’s great because it has an app that goes along with the game. You can download the app for free. It does all the work for you. It tells you when to put your head down, who looks up and what action they do. It’s super fun, and kids and adults love it.
Telestrations This is another fun party game. It’s like whisper-down-the alley but pictionary style. It’s hilarious and super fun!
Ticket to Ride This game is a little expensive. Somebody bought it for us, but we like it. It’s a longer board game, but it’s not complicated. Even our five and six-year olds can play it.
CodeNames- Disney We have CodeNames and CodeNames Disney. We love these games! Super fun family game. The kids have a blast; we’ve also played it with adults and had just as much fun. The kids of course loved the CodeNames Disney the best!

My Favorite Hand-Crafted Gifts

Emily Lane Designs I have recently discovered Emily’s handmade clay earrings. They are amazing! They are beautiful and so unique and different.
Masterpiece Candles Co My friend, Keya makes and sells amazing candles on Etsy! Check out her shop. You won’t regret it! A few of my favorites scents are Candy Cane, Vanilla, Cinnamon Bun, and Birthday Cake.

Gifts for Her

Impress Nails These are my go-to when I don’t have time or money to get a manicure. I love these press-on nails. My sister got me started on them. You can’t go wrong with the price, and there are lots to choose from!
PaperMate Colored Pens These are my favorite pens to write with, and they make a great present too.
Lap Desk Matt got me this lap desk, and I love it. I use it all the time. It’s a perfect gift for the person who is always working on their laptop.
Apron Matt gets me these aprons from Williams Sonoma. After ruining countless shirts from cooking, I wear an apron every time I cook now. These aprons are great because they are really hardy, almost like a canvas material. I love mine. I saw they even have a cute Christmas one this year.
Clear Coffee Mugs These make the perfect mugs for company. They go with any place setting and look dressy without costing lots of money. I’ve had mine for sevaral years and can’t remember which exact ones we bought, but the ones in the link look just like mine.
Erin Condren Personalized Planner These planners are awesome because you can personalize them with a picture and a name on the front. We love them.
Books
1. My Faithfully Stepping Journals
2. Devotionals by Matt and I
3. Forgiving What You Can’t Forget by Lysa TerKeurst
4. Falling Free: Rescued from the Life I Always Wanted by Shannan Martin
5. Don’t Overthink It by Anne Bogel
6. My Fantasy Series
7. Love Lives Here by Maria Goff

Gifts for Him

Bose Wireless Speaker. This is definitely a more expensive gift, but we got one of these years ago and use it every day. It’s great becaue you can take it with you to every different room in the house for music or take it in the car for road trips. We listen to music, podcasts, and audio books on it.
Bluetooth transmitter for car. This is a nifty gadget that we need to get. My father-in-law has one in his car. You can plug it into the auxiliary power outlet in your car and play music from your phone through the car’s sound system. This is great if you have an older car that doesn’t have Bluetooth capability.
Parker Pens. My husband loves these pens and asks for them every year. They write really smoothly, and he uses them all the time.
Books
1. Play the Man by Mark Batterson
2. Gears, Grease, and God by Matt and Tom Manney
3. Men’s Daily Journals
4. Ego is the Enemy by Ryan Holiday
5. The Artisan Soul by Erwin Raphael McManus
6. Dream Big by Bob Goff.

Gifts for Kids

Bliss Lights My brother-in-law got all three colors of these for my kids. We absolutely love them. We put them on every single night. They are by far the best night light. You have to check them out.
Fire Tablets We scored these last year for $20 on Black Friday, but they’re still a great deal at $40. Our kids use their tablets all the time. On their day off, they can watch stuff on them like Netflix or Disney and play games. Instead of them fighting over the tv, they can each watch what they want. They also use them for alarms and for listening to audio books or podcasts or music during rest time. We love them and get a lot of use out of them!
Books
1. Wings of Fire Series
2. Secret of the Hidden Scrolls Series
3. Mr. Lemoncello Books
4. Dog Books by Jennifer Li Shotz
5. Kingdom of Wrenly Series
6. Kid’s Daily Journals
Magnetic Bookmarks Our kids love these and use them all the time.
Kinetic Sand I’m not sure what it is about kinetic sand, but our kids love it. We usually buy some every year for Christmas.
Dot Markers All ages love these markers. I love that they’re so easy to use that my little ones could use them when they were little, but my older kids now still love using them too.

Those are some of our family’s favorite things. Hopefully, it gave you some ideas to finish up the last of your Christmas shopping!

If you enjoyed this and want some other ideas, try Revolutionize Your Morning Time with These Ten Products.

3 Truths You Need to be Reminded of This Christmas

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Four Suicides Too Many

Overall, Christmas 2020 looks a little different than any other year. This year has been a year like no other. Some people have been able to continue on as if nothing ever happened, and others have had their lives literally torn apart. I started a file of pictures on my phone of people that we know that have taken their lives this year. Right now, I have four pictures in that file. That’s four lives too many; four lives cut short way too soon. My heart breaks every time I look at those photos.

I keep those photos because I don’t want to forget the huge impact this year has had on some people. Unsurprisingly, this year, more than any other year, we have dealt with divorce, infidelity, depression, and suicide more than any other year in our ministry.

3 Truths Somebody Needs to Hear From You

I say all that to encourage you with this— Don’t underestimate the power of a kind word this season. This year more than ever, we need to remind the people in our lives of these three truths:

They are loved.
They have value.
They are needed.

If you’re not struggling this year or this season, use your strength to help someone else. Give your love to somebody this Christmas. Write a card, call someone just to let them know you are thinking of them, cook a meal for a family, send flowers, do Christmas for a family. If you look around, you won’t find it hard to find someone who needs extra love and encouragement this Christmas season.

3 Truths You Need to Hear

Maybe you are at a place where you need to hear these truths yourself. Maybe you are the one who needs to hear these truths. So, let me repeat them.

You are loved.
You have value.
You are needed.

Don’t believe the lie of the devil that your family would be better off without you. We’ve been there too many times to pick up the pieces after a suicide. Let me tell you—the family and friends left behind have never been better off. Their hearts and lives are beyond devastated, and they aren’t sure if they will ever be whole again.

Whatever you are dealing with or going through right now, I know with one hundred percent certainty that your family is not better without you. They need you. They can’t do life without you.

More Encouragement

Two of the Christmas songs that I am loving this year are Hope is Here by Building 429 and Behold Him by Francesca Battistelli. Both songs came out within the last month or two. Listen to the words and let them encourage your heart as they have mine.

For more posts like this, read Now is Probably Not the Time and What Now?

**With a post like this, I feel that I need to say that if you are seriously struggling with depression or suicidal thoughts, please get the help you need. Get professional help. There is no shame in that. We all need extra help sometimes.

Black Friday Traditions

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My Favorite Day of the Year

I think over the years that Black Friday has become my favorite day of the year. I like it even better than Christmas. Every year, we get up and make a nice breakfast. Then we drag the tree and Christmas boxes up from the basement. We put on our favorite Christmas movies like Elf, Noelle (Disney), The Grinch (the one with Benedict Cumberbatch as the voice of the Grinch), Christmas Chronicles (Netflix), and more. We spend the day watching movies while we decorate both the inside of the house and the outside.

We make fun treats like Christmas bread and Christmas cookies and homemade Chex mix, inspired by Pioneer Woman. Matt has perfected this recipe over the year by making it gluten-free and tweaking some of the spices, like adding extra Worcestershire. It’s soo good, and it makes the entire house smell amazing.

Early Black Friday Shopping

Mom and daughter ready for Black Friday shopping — Maddie and I early this morning

We usually stay home every year on Black Friday, but my daughter Madison has been begging me for weeks to take her shopping on Black Friday so she can use her money to get Christmas presents for the family. So I caved and took her out early this morning. We had a good time together. She got all her Christmas shopping done; then we got home to make breakfast and get started decorating.

Keeping Traditions

There’s something about traditions, about doing the same thing each year. It’s predictable and something to look forward to. Sometimes the best traditions don’t cost anything; they’re simply about being together with the people you love. It’s about being purposeful and sticking to the tradition, even when you don’t feel like it.

Whatever your traditions are for the holidays, don’t give up on them this year just because everything is different and more difficult. In a year when everything is topsy- turvy, sticking with your traditions can help bring a sense of familiarity and comfort to you and your family.

If this post encouraged you, check out God’s Gifts at Christmas.