Years ago, I started reading a Psalm before I go to bed at night. I started the habit during a particularly fearful time in my life; that habit has stayed with me over the years.
Our Daughter’s Fear
Our daughter, Maggie, has taken up the habit in a slightly different way. She has several verses that she’s written on paper taped to the wall above and around her bed. Most of those verses are taken from Psalms. Every night, she stands next to her bed and reads over those verses before crawling into bed. It’s the only thing that has helped her over the years to be able to calm herself and go to bed at night. She has always had a hard time going to sleep at night and has always been our most fearful child.
Sometimes I forget she does this every night because she does it after I leave her room for the night–after she’s tucked in and prayed with. But she reminded me the other day when we were working on our Scripture memory for school. We started reading our Psalm, and she stopped me. “Mom, I already know this one because it’s one of the verses I read every night before bed.”
Good Habits
Some habits can be really bad and difficult to break, but some habits are freeing and life-giving. Reading or reciting a verse or two from Psalms before bed is a habit that is both of those things. I’ve watched it make a difference in not only my life but also my daughter’s. Sometimes it’s the simplest things in life that make all the difference in the world.
Reasons We Can’t Sleep at Night
There are so many reasons we have a hard time going to sleep at night.
Fear
Worry
Anxiety
Shame and Guilt
Feelings of not enough
Reminders of our failures
A mind that refuses to shut down
An overactive imagination
Drinking too much caffeine
Feeling overwhelmed
Whatever the cause, there are plenty of reasons we have a hard time falling asleep at night. The best way I’ve found to fight back is to calm my mind and my spirit by reading the Psalms. Sometimes it’s just a few verses. Sometimes, it’s a few chapters. Other times, I need to recite a few verses multiple times in my head before I finally drift off to sleep.
If you’re struggling with any of these reasons for not being able to sleep at night, try reading the Psalms. See if it doesn’t make a difference and help give you the peace you need to calm your mind and sleep.
It’s been raining all week here as we’re getting some of the effects of hurricane Debby. Twice in the past week, I’ve gotten caught up in really nasty weather while driving. The first time it was that really hard, driving rain where it’s hard to see anything. I was on my way to Panera to put in some writing time when I get caught in the downpour. The second was on the highway. We got caught in a downpour again; only this time, it turned into a hailstorm.
On the drive to Panera, I almost convinced myself to turn around and go back home. But I just kept going. It took a long time to get there, but I finally made it. I ran inside Panera and dried off and got to work. An hour later, I looked outside, and the sun was out. The storm clouds were gone, and I was really glad I had stuck it out.
The Storms of Life
Storms are not fun, and yet they’re a part of life. Some storms are bigger than others; some cause more damage than others, and no two storms are the same. But there is one thing about storms that always remains the same—they don’t last forever. Every storm, no matter how bad, comes to an end.
In the midst of the storm though, it doesn’t feel like it will end. If you’ve ever gotten stuck in a bad storm, it can be terrifying. Fear tells you to turn around and go home, to run, that it won’t be okay. The fear can twist us up and make us see and feel things that aren’t there; it can also heighten our feelings. And yet, if you just wait it out, the storm will pass…just like the storm when I was at Panera.
Scary Storms
Sometimes, however, the storm is terrifying; and it doesn’t pass quite so easily. We were stuck on the side of the highway for a good fifteen minutes, along with all the other cars and semi-trucks. The hail finally stopped, but there was no sign that the driving rain was going to stop anytime soon. In fact, it was supposed to continue for hours. We had to keep going; we knew we couldn’t just sit on the side of the road for the rest of the night.
We had to pull back onto the highway and continue on, even though we couldn’t see the car in front of us. It was nerve-rattling, but we eventually made it home. The rain didn’t stop that night. In fact, it’s continued all week. It’s a good thing we didn’t wait for the rain to stop, or we’d still be sitting on the side of the road.
Waiting for the Storm to Pass
Some storms last a long time, and if we’re not careful, we will let life pass us by while we’re waiting for the storm to pass. Sometimes, we have to continue on, even in the midst of the storm. It’s not fun, and it’s scary at times. But if we try to wait it out, we might lose days, months, or even years of our lives to the storm. We have to figure out a way to keep going, even in the midst of the storm. We have to choose to keep showing up, keep spending time with God, keep loving, keep serving, and keep choosing joy…even in the midst of the storm.
Seasons of Life
There are seasons for everything in our lives, and that includes trials. The writer of Ecclesiastes reminds us of this.
For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. A time to be born and a time to die. A time to plant and a time to harvest. A time to kill and a time to heal. A time to tear down and a time to build up. A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance. A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones. A time to embrace and a time to turn away. A time to search and a time to quit searching. A time to keep and a time to throw away. A time to tear and a time to mend. A time to be quiet and a time to speak. A time to love and a time to hate. A time for war and a time for peace.
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 NLT
Storms are just for a Season
Everything has a season, and every season has a time. Storms are a part of a season, and they don’t last forever. The good news is that God makes an end to things. He allows tests and trials into our lives for a time and for a specific purpose. That test will come to an end, and he will strengthen us and place us on a firm foundation.
In his kindness God called you to share in his eternal glory by means of Christ Jesus. So after you have suffered a little while, he will restore, support, and strengthen you, and he will place you on a firm foundation.
I Peter 5:10 NLT
Stand Strong
Are you in a storm right now? Maybe you’re in a series of storms, and it doesn’t seem like the end is anywhere in sight. Don’t let fear make you run. Keep your feet firmly planted in faith. Spend time with God each day; show up to what you have to do. Stay faithful. Because there’s a time coming, maybe in the not-too-distant future when the rain will start to ease up, the clouds will begin to roll back, and the sun will shine brightly once again.
There will be an end to this storm; don’t lose your faith or your testimony in the meantime.
There’s a story in the New Testament that sort of throws into question everything we understand about Jesus and who we perceive him to be. We see him healing the blind and lame, encouraging people, loving the unlovable. And then everything is flipped on its head when we see that his friends ask him to come heal their brother, and he ignores their request.
Jesus’ Friendship with Mary, Martha, and Lazarus
No one can argue about the fact that Jesus loved Mary, Martha, and Lazarus. He was friends with all of them. We get the understanding that he fellowshipped with them often. They were comfortable with him enough to demand why he hadn’t been there when Lazarus died.
And yet, when Jesus receives the news that Lazarus is dying, he doesn’t go. Mary and Martha send word to him, and he chooses not to go to them. He could have gone and healed him, kept him from dying in the first place. But he doesn’t. We see that from John 11.
When he heard this, Jesus said, “This sickness will not end in death. No, it is for God’s glory so that God’s Son may be glorified through it.”Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus.So when he heard that Lazarus was sick, he stayed where he was two more days,
John 11:4-6 NLT
Martha’s Accusation
Jesus finally decides to go to Mary and Martha. They are understandably upset and confused. Martha meets Jesus and stares into his eyes as she accuses, “If you would have been here, my brother wouldn’t have died.” That’s how Martha tackled it–straight on. We know the rest of the story. We know that Jesus brings Lazarus back to life, but Mary and Martha didn’t know that ending. They only knew that Jesus failed to come when they needed him, and now their brother was dead.
A Powerful Lesson about Being Loved
There is a powerful lesson to learn here, one that’s not for the faint of heart. It’s a lesson that all of us will learn the hard way in this life.
What God does or doesn’t do in your life is not an indicator of his love for you.
Take a moment to reread those words. Now let’s unpack those seemingly harsh words. We have a basic understanding of God that is based on a one-to-one ratio. If God loves me, he will be good to me. If God blesses me, he loves me. If he provides for my needs, he loves me. When good things are happening in my life, God loves me.
Our Understanding of God’s Love
We also believe the opposite in this one-to-one ratio. If bad things are happening in my life, God doesn’t love me. If he’s not blessing me or providing for my needs, he doesn’t love me.
Yet, we can see from this story, that that’s not always how God works. Jesus loved Mary and Martha deeply, and yet he allowed them to go through this horrible tragedy. He didn’t change it for them or make it any easier. He had a different plan, a better one; though it was not necessarily a less painful plan.
God is Greater than Our Feelings
We have to remember that how God works in our lives is not an indicator of his love for us. How we feel is not an indicator of his love for us. Our feelings will never be an indicator of God’s love for us, because feelings change all the time. God’s love never changes. I love this verse from I John.
Even if we feel guilty, God is greater than our feelings, and he knows everything.
I John 3:20
God is greater than our feelings. It may seem like God has forgotten you; it may feel like he’s so very far away. But never doubt his love for you. The moment you begin to doubt God’s love, Satan gets a foothold and comes barging in, ready to wreak havoc in your life. After all, he’s the one whispering lies to you about God’s love.
Reminders of Being Loved
Let me hear of your unfailing love each morning, for I am trusting you. Show me where to walk, for I give myself to you.
Psalm 143:8 NLT
For the law was given through Moses, but God’s unfailing love and faithfulness came through Jesus Christ.
John 1:17 NLT
We love each other because he loved us first.
I John 4:19
Your unfailinglove, O Lord, is as vast as the heavens; your faithfulness reaches beyond the clouds.
Psalm 36:5
I don’t know what you’re walking through today, but don’t ever doubt God’s love for you. Sometimes, when it feels that he is so far away, he’s actually working on your behalf. He’s making a better, a greater plan, one that you can’t see just yet. Trust in his love today; trust that he’s bringing everything together in your life to make it work out for his glory and your good.
I am one of those people that just doesn’t have a great memory. My husband can remember details of things that happened when he was a kid in detail. I can’t remember what I had for breakfast yesterday morning, or why I entered the kitchen at this moment. Whenever somebody needs to remember something–a name, an event, etc–I always send them to Matt. They have a way better chance with him than with me.
Often, even people that have really good memories struggle with being forgetful when it comes to the good things God has done for us. How quickly we forget what God did for us in the past. And yet, we have long-term memory of all the ways God has failed us in the past. Why is that? Why is it so easy to remember the bad and forget the good?
The Disciples’ Short-Term Memory Loss
The disciples had a problem with short-term memory loss as well. Jesus does the miracle of the loaves and fishes and provides supernaturally for hundreds of people. And yet, soon after, they forgot about it. Jesus calls them on it in Matthew 16.
At this they began to argue with each other because they hadn’t brought any bread. Jesus knew what they were saying, so he said, “You have so little faith! Why are you arguing with each other about having no bread?Don’t you understand even yet? Don’t you remember the 5,000 I fed with five loaves, and the baskets of leftovers you picked up?
Matthew 16:7-9 NLT
Their Lack of Faith
Jesus asks this question, “Don’t you remember?” He questions the fact that they already forgot what he did. And he directly ties their lack of faith to the fact that they couldn’t remember what he had done. His indictment of their faith was simply because they forgot. They forgot the incredible miracle he had performed right in front of their eyes.
If the disciples forgot and they spent time with Jesus every day, what are the chances that we won’t forget? Pretty slim.
David’s Long-Term Memory
How did David remember God’s goodness? He wrote it down. That’s why we have the book of Psalms today. David recorded God’s goodness, so he wouldn’t forget.
But then I recall all you have done, O Lord; I remember your wonderful deeds of long ago.
Psalm 77:11
If we want to remember God’s goodness, we have to reprogram our minds to remember. How do we do that? Here are three easy ways to do that each and every day.
3 Ways to Reprogram Our Minds
Cultivate daily gratitude. I do this through my Faithfully Stepping Journal. I take the first five minutes of my morning time routine to write down all the things I’m grateful for.
Cultivate long-term gratitude. Write down what God has done in the past, so we don’t forget in the future. Matt has a leather journal that we write down the things God has done for us–how he’s provided for us, the ways he’s blessed us, etc.
Choose to trust in God’s goodness. It’s a choice, a choice to believe in God’s faithfulness and goodness. It’s a choice today to choose to remember the good God has done for me. It’s also a choice to focus on all the bad things that has happened in the past. The choice is yours to make…each and every day.
Remembering God’s goodness and focusing on that, even in the midst of hard circumstances strengthens our faith. And it’s that faith that will see us through this storm and the next. But we have to choose to strengthen that faith; we have to make a choice to remember God’s goodness and not forget when the times get hard.
I had two different conversations with two different people I’m close to this week, and my heart hurt for them because of all the burdens they are carrying. Sometimes life is messy and difficult and the burdens become too much to carry. I know because I’ve been there. And then in the midst of those conversations, I read in my morning time this week what Jesus had to say about it.
Carrying Heavy Burdens
This passage in the book of Matthew has always eluded me. I think some of Jesus’ words are supposed to do that. We were not created in our finite minds to understand infinte things. But I also think that some passages of Scripture become more clear the longer we study them. I think this is one of those passages. I don’t know that I’ll ever truly understand it, but the older I get, the more I study it, the clearer it becomes.
Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”
Matthew 11:28-30 NLT
I read this passage this week in my morning time, and it troubled me…as it usually does. Jesus tells us that the burden He gives is light, but how is that possible when our burdens feel so heavy? I couldn’t help but think of my friends who are going through such difficult times right now. How can Jesus’ burdens be lighter than the ones they’re already carrying? And why on earth would we want to carry more burdens?
Jesus’ Call
Jesus first puts out a call. It’s a call to those who are weary, tired, and are carrying heavy burdens. Does that sound like you or anybody you know? My hand is raised; I think that’s pretty much everybody…and Jesus knew that. We all struggle first under the load of sin, guilt, and shame. Jesus was putting out a call to those who were burdened by sin and brokenness to come to Him and find a different way to do life.
The call also goes out to those of us still striving to do things on our own. We get crushed under the weight and burdens of this world–financial trouble, pressures, loss of a job, a divorce, a child that walks away from God, a dream that isn’t fulfilled, the loss of a loved one…the list goes on and on. Those troubles build up, and the burdens become too heavy to carry. So Jesus puts out the call and says come to me.
Jesus’ Offer
What does he offer in exchange for our heavy burdens? Rest. It’s not the kind of rest you get from taking a nap when you’re exhausted. No, it goes far deeper than that. It’s a kind of soul rest–the kind of rest that only Jesus can give.
But he doesn’t stop there. He continues the thought. He tells us how we can get the rest we seek. At this point, we rush forward because we want to find that rest. So how do we find it?
Jesus says, “Take my yoke on you…and you will find rest for your soul.”
Understanding the Yoke
Okay, I’m not too much into farming, but even I know what a yoke is. And the last time I saw two oxen yoked together, it wasn’t because they were napping! It’s this oxymoron. Jesus says if you want rest, take my yoke on you. It’s seems so counterintuitive. It makes absolutely no sense…until we understand the job of a yoke.
A yoke is something that’s been around since somewhere around 4000BC, so it’s not something new. And it’s something the people of Jesus’ day would have understood even more clearly than we do today. The job of a yoke is to distribute the weight of whatever the two ox are carrying evenly, not just between the two oxen but also on the ox itself. The yoke helps to distribute the weight evenly on the shoulders of the ox. So not only does it make the job easier on the ox itself, but when you yoke two oxen together, they can more than double the load they carry. A single oxen can carry around 5,000 pounds. Two oxen together can carry around 15,000 pounds.
Understanding Jesus’ Teaching
Jesus makes the statement, “You will find rest for your soul.” I don’t think there’s a person in this world that doesn’t crave rest for their soul–a rest from the pressures and worries of this world, a break from sin and guilt and shame, a rest that’s so deep, it brings peace to our very soul.
And yet, Jesus says the way to find this rest is to take his yoke on us. He continues the thought in the next verse when he says, “For my yoke is easy to bear, and my burden is light.” There’s that word again. Burden. Jesus giving us a burden to bear seems to go against everything he’s taught us. And yet, those are his words.
Jesus’ Burden
When we yoke up with Jesus, we don’t have to carry the burden by ourself any longer. Now Jesus carries it along with us. And we already know that two people can carry a much greater weight than a single person can (two oxen yoked together compared to one). When we attach ourselves to Jesus, the load becomes a lot easier to bear because we’re no longer pulling it by ourselves. And our capacity to bear up under that burden becomes stronger because we can pull a greater weight.
Jesus tells us that after we yoke up with him, the burden is light because his burden is light. Could it be that the burden doesn’t change weight? Think about this. An ox has to drag a cart that’s 5,000 pounds by itself. If you yoke it up to another ox, that 5,000 pounds isn’t going to feel nearly as heavy. You could even add another two or three thousand pounds, and it’s still going to feel lighter than carrying 5,000 pounds by itself.
So when Jesus says, yoke up with me and carry my burden, it’s still going to be lighter than the burdens we’ve been carrying on our own. He also says is burden is easy and his yoke is light. And I have a feeling the burden he wants us to carry looks a lot more like loving people and telling them about Jesus than agonizing over our finances, our job, or our failures.
Practically Speaking
So what does it look like to yoke up with Jesus and to carry his burden? I think it looks a lot like getting up each morning and spending time with him first thing through a morning time routine and using that time to give him our burdens and to ask what burden he has for us to carry. Then it looks like loving people and following the Holy Spirit’s guiding and prompting throughout the day.
It’s refusing to drown in our own burdens and instead focus on what Jesus wants us to. It’s a shifting of our focus from ourselves to God and what his plan for our life is, not our own.
If you’re feeling the weight of your burdens today, it’s because you’re trying to carry them on your own; and you’re not designed to carry them on your own. Instead, give those burdens to God and ask for his burden instead. Yoke yourself to God and see if that load doesn’t become a whole lot lighter!
A friend of ours passed away this week after a tough battle with cancer. She leaves behind a husband and four kids. We followed her journey on Facebook and were kept up-to-date from other friends of ours. My heart breaks for the family–the ones left behind.
The Big Picture
In the midst of that this week, I was called in to help mediate a conflict. I made several phone calls and listened at length to what was going on. After trying to put all the pieces together and make sense of it, I finally came to the conclusion that grace needed to be extended. As I listened and worked through the issue, I couldn’t help but think about how problems like these are so small in the grand scheme of things. In the face of death, everything else seems to pale in comparison.
We’re Not Guaranteed Tomorrow
I was reminded this week that life can change so suddenly. We’re not guaranteed tomorrow. In light of that, we have to choose to make the most of the time we have and live in a way that we don’t have any regrets. Our friend posted a picture of herself and her family just a few days before she passed away and wrote, “May be my last…”
I’ve been thinking about the brevity of life all this week. James writes this,
How do you know what your life will be like tomorrow? Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone.
James 4:14 NLT
We don’t know how long we have; we don’t know when today could be our last. So how do we live with that in mind? Here are five quick thoughts.
Forgive quickly. Let offenses go. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Choose to offer grace. Proverbs 19:11 says, “Sensible people control their temper; they earn respect by overlooking wrongs.”
Choose to love those around you. Spend time with your family and loved ones. Make memories together. You never know when they could be your last.
Spend time doing what really matters. Grow in your relationship with God; spend time in his word and through prayer with a morning time routine.
Figure out what it is God wants you to do with your life and go after it with your whole heart. Work hard. Do what he created you to do.
Live each day as if it were your last…because you don’t know when it will be.
None of us want to have regrets whether it’s at the end of our lives or simply when we pillow our head at night. So let’s live in a way that we don’t have to deal with those regrets.
More Encouragement
A book I always recommend when talking about the brevity of life is The Hardest Peace by Kara Tippetts. I’m forewarning you, though, make sure you have a box of tissues when you read it.
We had an amazing time away as we took our annual trip across the country to visit my parents in Colorado. This year, we added some extra excitement by tacking on a trip to the Southwest. So after our time in Colorado, including seeing family, hitting Estes Park and Rocky Mountain National Park, we drove south and landed in Arizona.
Arizona and Texas
We got to visit Arches National Park on the way and see the amazing scenery God created there. Then we got to visit the Grand Canyon, which is indescribable. This was my second time visiting but Matt and the kids’ first time. Then after a few days in Arizona, we began the trip back home by way of New Mexico and Texas.
We got to stop at the Magnolia store in Waco, Texas. I’ve been talking about doing that for years. That was such a fun stop. And of course, we had to stop in San Antonia to visit the Alamo and do the riverwalk. I’ve wanted to take Matt there forever. It was so fun exploring the area together as a family.
On the way back, we got to visit Nashville; and Matt and Malachi got to visit the Corvette Museum in Louisville before spending a few hours with my sister and her family.
Family Memories
And then right after we got back, we sent the oldest two to church camp for the week. With them being gone, the house seemed so much quieter, even though we still had the younger two with us. It gave us a little peek into what it’s going to be like in just a few years when they go to college. Having them gone just reinforced the fact that we did the right hing taking that big trip. Before a big trip like the one we took, I start to second guess. The money, the time away, the being on the road, the wear and tear on the car…is it all worth it? It sometimes seems too extravagant. God reminded me this week that the time we have with our kids is limited. We won’t always have them with us.
So we need to take these trips while we can. Spend the time together while we can. Make the memories, take the pictures, visit the sights. In a few years, when they’re gone, I know we’re going to be so grateful for every single trip we took together and every memory we made.
What memories are you making with your family this summer?
It seems like strawberry season comes up so fast. Winter drags on and on here in PA, and then all of a sudden, one day, it’s almost summer. I feel like we skip spring altogether. But right in the middle there, between the end of winter and the almost beginning of summer is one of my favorite times of year–strawberry-picking season. If you blink, you miss it. In fact, for several years, we did miss it. For us, strawberry picking season comes right in the middle of finishing off homeschool and getting ready to leave on vacation.
Window of Opportunity
We finally figured out, we usually get a window of about a week between when the strawberries are ready to pick at our favorite orchard and when we have to leave on vacation. So as soon as we get the notification that the strawberries are ready, we plan the trip to our favorite orchard in Lancaster to pick them. Every year, I don’t think we’re going to have the time to fit it in, but we make it work somehow. And I’m always so glad that we do
Life happens in so many seasons and stages. Sometimes, we don’t have to move for a long time, years in fact. Other times, it’s like strawberry picking season. You have to be ready to move when it’s time. God prompts your heart, and you realize the time is now and you have to make a move.
Paul’s Example
I wonder if sometimes we miss out on opportunities God has for us simply because we aren’t ready and willing to move when the opportunity comes. I read yesterday in my morning time about Paul being willing to move at a moment’s notice.
That night Paul had a vision: A man from Macedonia in northern Greece was standing there, pleading with him, “Come over to Macedonia and help us!” Sowe decided to leave for Macedonia at once, having concluded that God was calling us to preach the Good News there.
Acts 16:9,10 NLT
As soon as Paul got the notice, he moved. He got right to it. He never wasted time when God was leading him. He got right to the work God had for him, even if that meant traveling for a little while.
Self-Reflection
Do I move when God leads? Am I ready to move when he wants me too? Do I obey even in the small ways, so when it’s time, God can lead me in a big way?
Strawberry season reminds me to be ready and watching and waiting for what God has next so I don’t miss out!
In other news, my latest book under my pen name, A. J. Manney, released today. The Flirty Forward, a hockey romance, is available in paperback and ebook if you’re looking for a fun, flirty, clean read for the weekend!
We were on our way to church a few weeks ago. Everybody had done a good job getting ready on time and getting the house picked up, so we had time to stop at our Sunday morning favorite place—Wawa. For those of you who are unfamiliar with Wawa, it’s a glorified gas station with food screens to be able to order pretty much anything your heart desires. So we came out armed with breakfast sandwiches for the kids and coffee for Matt and I. It was a rainy day, but we were making the best of it.
Our Accident
We were less than ten minutes away from the church, driving and talking, when we saw a car come around the corner ahead of us and lose control of the vehicle. Matt tried to get out of its way, but it came into our lane and crashed into us. The airbags went off, coffee cups exploded, tossing coffee all over the front of the car and the windshield, breakfast sandwiches got smashed. All in all, it was a mess. Everybody was stunned but okay. Matt helped get the kids out of the car. My door was hit and unable to open, so I crawled out Matt’s door. Then we stood in the rain for the next hour or so while we waited for emergency crews to get there, the police to take our statement, and finally get a ride to church.
A Rough Morning
It went from being a really great morning to being a wreck…literally. Matt and I were soaking wet by the time we got to church. My hair was dripping water down my coffee-soaked and rain-soaked shirt. Needless to say, it was a rough morning. That morning came after a series of months of struggles—nothing serious but just things that were taking our time and attention. We’ve been trying for five months to get our kids insurance reinstated; it’s been a ridiculous process. The county has lost at least three of our applications, we’ve been given insurance and then had it pulled weeks later, due to negligence on their part. As a family with a daughter with major medical needs (our eight-year-old has Type 1 Diabetes), it’s been a stressful few months. We’ve spent hours and hours on the phone trying to get things straightened out. There have been some other pressures and things we’ve been dealing with the last few months as well.
God’s Protection
And yet, I can’t complain because God’s been good. The same weekend we had our accident, a family we know of also had an accident. They didn’t fare nearly as well. The mom died at the scene of the accident, and the sixteen-year-old daughter died a few days later. It’s absolutely heartbreaking. So when I compare, we have nothing to complain about; I am so thankful. And yet, life just keeps happening.
Have you ever been there? Nothing is truly, terribly wrong, so you feel like you shouldn’t complain. But the stressors and pressures just seem to be piling up.
Losing Control
I pulled back recently after feeling discouraged and honestly depressed. I struggle this time of year—when it feels like summer will never come in PA. We’ve had literally hundreds of days of rain and overcast skies, and that eventually wears you down. I’ve wondered what’s going on? Why do I feel like this?
And then in our small group on Tuesday night, Matt asked each of us to tell the group what it seems God is doing in our lives right now. I thought about it, and while I waited for my turn, I considered everything from these past few months…and it sort of hit me suddenly. I figured it out. God has been wrestling me for control, and I’ve been wrestling right back.
In my scheduled, planned out, homeschooled, writing world, control is everything for me. When I don’t have control, I spiral out of control. As I waited for my turn, I thought about how I’ve spent the last several months trying to control things that are absolutely out of my control. I feel like the accident was the icing on the cake of control…or lack thereof.
Wrestling for Control
So when it was my turn to share, I told everybody, “I think God is trying to take control, and I’m not letting him. I’m fighting him for control.” The group, who knows I’ve been losing my mind fighting for insurance the last several months understood exactly what I was talking about. This isn’t something new for me; fighting for control is something I’ve struggled with my entire life. And yet, I know that when I surrender those things that are out of my control to God, I have so much more peace. I know that; I just forget it sometimes. Tuesday night, I needed to be reminded of that.
So, I’m choosing, in the midst of my circumstances, to release the death grip I have on my life, my plans, my schedule…and letting God have control. I’ll still struggle and fight him for control, but He will graciously remind me that I don’t have any control. He’ll continue to shake up my life when things are starting to settle. He’ll get my attention. How do I know that? Because he’s done it time and time and time again in the past.
Finding Peace
If you’re in the same boat as me, wrestling God for control, or the thought of control because we don’t actually have control, find encouragement today in the fact that you can release your death grip on that control. You can allow God control and release that pressure you feel. I promise He will carry you and give you that peace you are longing for and work on your behalf along the way.
Did you know that you are the most productive you’re ever going to be right after you wake up? Your best hours are first thing in the morning. Matt read that in a book recently, and it totally makes sense. When else are you more productive than after you’ve just had a good night’s sleep? I know, of course, there’s a case for night owls and those who get a lot accomplished at night. I get it. Sometimes, I feel that way too. But there really is no better time, when your brain is awake and active to get things done…well, maybe after that first cup of coffee.
Your Best Hours
There are so many reasons that make it hard to get out of bed in the morning. I get it. I really do, but I also know that if I don’t get up early and tap into those quiet morning hours before the kids get up, my day is going to be shot. Your best working hours are those first few hours after you wake up. So that begs the question–what are you giving those hours to?
What’s the first thing you focus on in the morning? What gets your attention first thing? What are you giving your best hours to? There’s an argument to be made that whatever you spend your first attention on in the morning is where your priorities and focus are. Our focus should be on getting out of bed and starting our morning time routine, but life happens. Things take our focus, first thing in the morning. If we don’t make our morning time with God a priority, the day will be over before we realize it. We have to choose to make God a priority first thing in the morning.
Our Focus
I remember a lady came up to Matt after he taught on morning time and told him that he shouldn’t drink coffee for his morning time. She told him that he should focus on God first and not coffee. To that, he responded, “You do you.” Seriously though, we each have to do what works for us. For some of you, you might have to get up and nurse a baby first thing. Others may have to see a husband off to work right away. Life is messy, so it’s not going to look perfect. The goal is simply to do your best to focus on God first thing in the morning. That’s going to look different for each of us, but God knows our hearts.
Here’s a few quick tips to get your mornings back on track:
Go to bed at a good time the night before, so you can get up early.
