Tuesday Nights at Our House

On any given Tuesday night, if you were to drop by our home, you would hear the noise and chaos before you ever even stepped foot inside. Tuesday nights are full of what we call “beautiful chaos” in our home. It’s the night our small group from church gets together. Twenty-one of us gather in our small home. Thirteen of that twenty-one is kids ages ten and under. It’s pretty much a circus.  

When everyone first arrives, it’s a time of hugs and greetings. The kids take off right away to play outside or downstairs in the basement. The adults shrug off their coats and sit on the couches or at the tables. Usually, I have a few last-minute things to finish in the kitchen. Then we call the kids in, and we all gather together to pray. Then the real madness begins— getting thirteen kids and eight adults through the serving line and settled.  

I’ll admit; it gets a little crazy for a few minutes. Soon, though, it quiets down a little as everybody begins eating. We laugh and talk as we connect and eat. In a few minutes, we will clear the plates away and make room for dessert. Matt will get us set up with whatever Bible study we are currently doing. The kids will be sent to go play so we can begin our Bible study. They will come back and interrupt at least thirty times, but that’s just part of the deal.  

The Best Part of the Night

I love all of it, but this moment, right here is my favorite. I lift my fork to my mouth and take a moment to look around my table. A smile comes to my face as I study each of the faces that make up our small group. It’s a group of people that the world would have never put together. None of us even knew each other a few years ago.  

We are black and white and mixed. We come from all walks of life; we have different religious backgrounds and contrasting political values. Yet, somehow, we have become good friends, even the best of friends.  

These moments, when we’re all gathered around the table with plates piled high of barbecue chicken and mashed potatoes or nachos or fajitas, are precious. It’s a time when we can take a break away from work, away from the pressures of life, and just be together. The longer we sit around the table, the more everybody relaxes, letting their cares and concerns go for just a few blissful hours.  

Around Our Table

At this same table, we have shared heartbreak and sorrow, victories and accomplishments, frustrations and fears, prayer requests and praises. We’ve cried around this table and we’ve laughed. We’ve laughed so much, sometimes it hurts. We share a bond that goes deeper than casual friendship. It’s a bond you can only get with time.  

In a few hours, we will push away from the table and head out in different directions. The pressures of life, jobs, relationships and finances will once again come to the forefront. But for now, we push all that away and just enjoy being together. We laugh, talk, and connect with each other.  

What Grace Looks Like

To me, this is a beautiful picture of what grace looks like. Grace is what allows people from all different backgrounds to come together and form friendships. Grace allows the working moms to be gentle and non-judgmental to this stay-at home mom. Grace allows each of us to put ourselves in the other person’s shoes.  

Grace allows us to see past the flaws and imperfections of each other. This is the way God views each of us. He doesn’t see our mistakes and failures; instead, He sees the masterpiece He created. That’s how we are supposed to view others, but that’s usually not the case. We’ve been conditioned to notice those who are different than us. Of course, if they’re different than us, that automatically makes them wrong.  

Choosing to Just Show Up

Our small group isn’t perfect. We will be the first to admit we have a lot of flaws. We have arguments and disagreements with our spouses, we get frustrated with our children, we get weary and discouraged, we don’t always do things the best way. But one thing our group gets right each week is grace. We each choose to show up and love the others in our group with a God-kind of love, a love that overlooks imperfections. We’ve spent enough time together over the years that we know each other’s weaknesses. We could point those out and focus on those imperfections, but we don’t. Instead, we choose to overlook those imperfections because we remember we have our own. That’s grace.  

We show up each week and step into the chaos, ready to extend grace to one another. We spend time fellowshipping and encouraging each other through a good meal and a Bible study. Then we head out to our perspective workplaces for the week, ready to extend the grace that’s bubbling up inside of us from being together to other people. 

Choosing Beautiful Chaos

If you want beautiful chaos in your own life, invite people into your life and into your home who don’t believe like you do, who don’t vote for the same political party as yours, who don’t see life the same way you do. Instead of trying to change any of those differences, simply accept them. Then sit back and watch as God does something amazing as He intertwines their lives with yours and creates beautiful chaos.

**This post is an excerpt from my newest book, Finding Free: 5 Simple Steps to a More Peaceful, Content, and Happy You.

  

For More Encouragement

For more encouragement on this topic, read Love is Still the Answer.